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The 10 Stages of Driving During A Louisiana Flood

Torrential Rains Bring Historic Floods To Southern Louisiana
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With all the flooding from this past Wednesday behind us, I thought it might be a good idea to go through the 10 stages of driving anywhere in Louisiana during a flood, which is pretty much just another way of saying driving anywhere in Louisiana when it rains, because it always floods. Always.

It’s part of our charm.

Anyway, here you go. If you made it through Wednesday, you should be familiar with these. If not, or maybe if you just need to explain what it’s like to someone who doesn’t live here, then read on and be enlightened.

THE 10 STAGES OF DRIVING DURING A LOUISIANA FLOOD

  1. Don’t do it.
  2. But my boss said…
  3. Don’t care. Your car won’t make it.
  4. Yeah, but something about disciplinary action…
  5. Turn around. Don’t drown.
  6. But he said it’d go on my permanent record!
  7. What are you, twelve? Shut up. Stay home.
  8. Fine! I guess I’ll just watch Netflix, then.
  9. Good. You still gotta pick the kids up from school, though.
  10. CRAP.

And that’s pretty much how it goes here every time it floods, especially when the schools decide to let out 30 minutes earlier than usual, which just so happens to be about 30 minutes before the rain stops and the roads start to become passable again.

Good times, Louisiana.
Good times.

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